Why Financial Therapy for Women & Couples?

The truth is, I didn’t really start learning about personal finance until I was in my mid-twenties. My parents didn’t talk to me about money growing up, but what I learned from hearing them talk about it was that “money is stressful” and “there is never enough”. I got the message somewhere along the way that girls and women aren’t good at math or money and that I would need to find a man to take care of me.

I was the person in my family who did everything “right”, so I followed the traditional path to happiness. I went to college, found a great guy, chose a career path, went straight into grad school and got married. In the process, I spent all the money I made from working and took on over 100k in student loan debt by going out of state for school (twice!). Shortly after getting married, my husband and I added up our combined debt and discovered we owed $364,000 with a significant majority being student loan debt. And no that did not include a mortgage. We were speechless. We felt ashamed, sad and hopeless. Then we got on a VERY rigid plan and slowly started paying down our debt while saving money where we could. It was hard. We couldn’t even afford to pay the interest that was accruing on our loans. In 2019 we were able to increase our income significantly (which I realize is a privilege) and that helped us to be able to start making larger debt payments. In 2020 we began to realize how restrictive and unhealthy the personal finance program we were using was for our mental health and our relationships and we started adding in more balance and fun into our lives. I became obsessed with learning as much as I could about personal finance. In the process, my husband and I have had many conversations about values, fears, dreams, and goals related to money. I have also worked through my individual money story in therapy and through reading and self-reflective journaling. We have paid off over $250,000 in student loans so far and continue to slowly work toward debt freedom in a way that aligns with our values and stage of life.

When I learned about the field of Financial Therapy and realized I could use the skills and knowledge I gained from being a therapist to help other women and couples as a Financial Therapist, I knew this was the work I was meant to be doing!

Who I help

I specialize in working with women who focus on taking care of everyone else and neglect their own financial wellness. Deep down you have your own dreams and goals for the future that don’t necessarily match what society has told you is what you should want (i.e. the big house, nice car, fancy vacations, private school, etc.). Does this sound like you?

• You don’t think you are capable of making or managing money in a way that would allow you to create a life that aligns with your unique values.

• You might be a first-generation wealth builder navigating feelings of guilt for having more money than your parents.

• You are still living in a scarcity mindset that developed in childhood but is no longer serving you.

• You have trouble thinking long-term with money which might show up in your spending, saving and investing habits.

• Money was controlled or used against you in relationships and you aren’t sure what a healthy relationship with money even looks like.

• You need more effective ways of coping with your feelings.

If you are tired of feeling stressed and anxious about money and are ready to get your financial life in order without shame and guilt, I would love to talk with you.

Values

I have seen the harmful impact “experts” in the personal finance space can have on people from marginalized groups when focusing only on how hard an individual works without considering systems of inequality that make it easier for some and harder for others to get ahead financially.

Her Financial Therapy stands against all forms of oppression including but not limited to racism, sexism, classism, ableism, heterosexism, transphobia, and antisemitism. I strive to create a safe space for people of all backgrounds to feel comfortable being their true selves in financial therapy.

I am committed to continuing to understand the impact various systems of oppression have on my clients. I utilize my own therapy, peer consultation, and self-reflection practices to identify and challenge my own implicit biases. I welcome feedback regarding the ways in which I show up in session, in-person and online as I am always learning and growing.